Relationships come in many forms. Some are built on trust, some on shared values, and others on the fragile hope that one day, just maybe, your liquor store manager will slip you a bottle of the new Eagle Rare 12 release at retail.
If you’ve been bourbon hunting for more than five minutes, you already know this relationship is complicated. For many bourbon enthusiasts, the connection with their local liquor store manager feels less like a casual business transaction and more like a toxic situationship you just can’t quit.
Sound familiar? Here are the telltale signs you might be trapped in one.
You walk in with your head high, ready to browse, and maybe—just maybe—walk out with a special bottle. But before you can even get to the bourbon aisle, you see him: the manager, standing there like a gatekeeper to whiskey heaven.
You muster up the courage to ask, “Hey, got anything in the back?”
He doesn’t even look up from his clipboard. “Not for you.”
Suddenly, you’re transported back to high school gym class when you were picked last for dodgeball. You’ll buy a handle of Evan Williams just to feel like less of a failure, but deep down, you know the truth: it’s not about supply. It’s about you.
You’ve been loyal. You buy your beer there. You buy your mixers there. You even bought a bottle of Grey Goose for your in-laws there, and they didn’t deserve it.
But does loyalty matter? Not when the golf buddy shows up. Suddenly, a “very limited” Weller 12 appears from nowhere. That guy’s never bought a six-pack of High Life in his life, but somehow, he’s walking out with a unicorn while you’re holding a dusty bottle of Benchmark like a consolation prize.
Toxic relationships are all about favoritism—and your store manager is a master manipulator.
“Allocation? What allocation?”
That’s the line you get every time you ask about this season’s drops. They say Buffalo Trace doesn’t send them anything anymore. They shrug and swear they’ve never even seen a bottle of Blanton’s in the wild.
And yet, a week later, you spot a customer posting a triumphant haul on Facebook—holding the exact bottles your manager swore “never come in.”
You’re not crazy. They’re just gaslighting you.
Your spouse asks why you drove 40 minutes out of the way to that liquor store again. You sigh and say, “Well, you never know what might come in. Plus, I want to support local.”
But the truth? You’ve been mistreated. Overlooked. Strung along. You keep hoping that one day, your loyalty will pay off, but deep down, you know it’s more likely that you’ll just end up with another store pick of Knob Creek you don’t even want.
Every toxic relationship has mind games, and your liquor store manager plays them with shelf placement.
You walk in and there it is: a bottle of Eagle Rare sitting right on the counter. Your heart races. You inch closer, hand outstretched…
“Sorry,” he says, pulling it back. “That’s on hold for a customer.”
Why put it out in the first place? For the same reason an ex texts you at midnight just to ask how you’re doing: because they like the control.
Ever notice how the store manager makes you feel guilty just for asking about bourbon?
“Everybody wants Blanton’s,” they sigh, like you’re the 500th person to ask today. “It’s not like I’m hiding it from you.”
Suddenly, you feel like a nuisance. You mutter something about just grabbing some ice and mixers before you slink out the door.
This isn’t healthy communication. It’s manipulation.
How many times have you been told the same line?
“Buy a case of Tito’s and maybe I can get you something special.”
So you do it. You stock up on vodka you’ll never drink. You buy obscure craft beers you don’t even like. You pick up three different tequilas, hoping it’ll bump you up the “loyalty list.”
And after all that? You still end up paying $69.99 for a bottle of Buffalo Trace. MSRP: $29.99.
Congratulations. You’re being used.
“This year will be different,” you tell yourself. “They said more allocations are coming.”
But allocations come and go, and you’re still standing there empty-handed. Every time you think you’ve moved on, you catch yourself scrolling Facebook and seeing someone else brag about their “local hook-up.”
You keep holding out hope they’ll finally come around. But toxic relationships rarely change.
You catch yourself driving past another liquor store and wondering what it would be like. Would they treat you better? Would they actually sell you a bottle of Stagg Jr. at retail?
But you don’t stop. Because what if your store manager found out? What if they cut you off completely?
So you stay loyal. Trapped. Wondering if things could be different, but too afraid to try.
Other bourbon friends have warned you. They tell you it’s not worth it. They say no bottle is worth this kind of emotional manipulation.
But do you listen? Of course not. Because you’re convinced that one day, when the timing is right, the store manager will finally see your worth and reward you with that sweet, sweet E.H. Taylor Single Barrel.
Spoiler: They won’t.
So, what do you do when you realize you’re in a toxic relationship with your local liquor store manager?
1. Set boundaries. Stop buying bottles you don’t want just to get “on the list.”
2. Explore your options. There are plenty of stores in the sea.
3. Join a bourbon group. Sometimes the best bottles come from networking, not begging.
4. Drink what you like. Don’t let someone else’s control determine your enjoyment.
At the end of the day, bourbon is supposed to be fun. It’s supposed to be about community, flavor, and stories—not about groveling for shelf turds.
If your local store manager is making you feel like you’re trapped in a toxic relationship, maybe it’s time to cut ties. Find a store that appreciates you, not one that dangles unicorns like emotional bait.
Bourbon hunting is stressful enough without toxic dynamics. If you recognize yourself in any of the signs above, it’s time to ask the hard question: is this really worth it?
Because no matter how good the bottle, no pour should come with this much emotional baggage.
So take a deep breath, pour something you actually enjoy, and remember: the healthiest relationships are built on respect, trust, and maybe just a little bit of toasted oak.
Cheers.
In the fast-moving world of bourbon collecting and trading, guesswork costs money. Whether you're buying, selling, or just watching the market, you need real numbers—not hype.
The Bourbon Blue Book®, exclusively in the Bourboneur App, delivers the most accurate, verified, and up-to-date secondary market pricing available—covering nearly 7,500 bottles and growing.
No fluff. No filler. Just real pricing based on real sales, updated regularly so you can stay ahead of the market.
At just $3/month or $25/year, it's a no-brainer that pays for itself with your first smart move.
👉 Download the Bourboneur App on iOS or Android and get instant access to the Bourbon Blue Book®.
.png)
If you’re all about discovering standout bourbons, smart investing, and staying ahead of trends in the whiskey world, join our community of over 26,000 fellow Bourboneur’s.
👇 Scroll down and subscribe to our weekly email list for the latest bottle drops, market insights, and bourbon reviews.
And hey—don’t forget to show us some love on:
• TikTok
Whether you’re here for flavor notes, bottle recommendations, or just good vibes and whiskey wisdom, you’re in the right place.
0 Comments