At some point in every bourbon lover’s journey, the hobby stops being a hobby and becomes a condition. One day you’re casually sipping a pour after work; the next, you’re refreshing inventory trackers like a day trader with a caffeine addiction, texting your “guys” (you now have guys), and rearranging your shelves in alphabetical order “for airflow.”
If this sounds familiar, don’t worry—what you’re experiencing is perfectly normal. In fact, bourbon collecting follows a scientifically proven emotional progression known as The Five Stages of Bourbon Collecting, a process discovered after studying hundreds of bourbon fans who lost control in the whiskey aisle.
Let’s walk through it together.
“I’m not collecting bourbon. I’m just… stocking up.”
This is the phase where you insist your 27 unopened bottles are for “future tastings,” “special moments,” or “my friend’s wedding three years from now.” Meanwhile, your kitchen counter looks like a distillery gift shop exploded.
You tell people you can quit anytime.
You tell yourself you can quit anytime.
You cannot quit anytime.
“If I hit five stores before work, the universe owes me a Blanton’s.”
In this stage, you begin negotiating with fate, the bourbon gods, and sometimes gas station cashiers:
• “If I don’t find anything today, I swear I’ll take a break.”
• “If I find anything allocated, I’ll only buy one bottle.”
• “If I find Weller, I will absolutely not open a new credit card.”
You start mapping out “drive-time efficient” loops that happen to pass every liquor store within a 50-mile radius. Pure coincidence, you claim.
“HOW MUCH for that?! … okay, hear me out.”
This is where things get dark.
This is where bank accounts go to die.
You swear you’ll never pay more than MSRP, yet suddenly you're explaining to your spouse why a bottle of Old Rip Van Winkle costs more than your car payment. You tell them it’s an investment. You compare it to fine art. You insist it’s better than crypto.
You do not mention that you already cracked it open.
“I drink for the taste. But also, yes, I do track batch numbers in Excel.”
You now own a Glencairn polishing cloth.
You’ve started saying things like "the barrel staves used impart a unique mid-palate.”
You have opinions—strong ones—about single malts, store picks, distiller history, and whether or not toasted finishes are cheating.
At this point you’ve ascended beyond casual bourbon drinker, beyond collector, and into something else entirely: a walking whiskey encyclopedia with an inflated sense of tasting note accuracy.
You’re happy here.
Your family is worried.
“Maybe… I could actually open these.”
This is the final breakthrough—the moment you realize bourbon is meant to be drunk, not worshipped like an oak-aged relic.
You crack that bottle you swore you’d save for “the perfect moment.”
You pour a generous dram.
You share it with someone who appreciates it.
You feel the weight lift from your shoulders like an evaporated angel’s share.
You are free.
Until the next bourbon drop.
Then the cycle begins again.
Bourbon collecting is a beautiful, chaotic, sometimes financially questionable journey. But it’s also a community, a passion, and a never-ending treasure hunt for flavor, story, and connection.
If you find yourself stuck somewhere between Stage 2 and Stage 4, don’t worry—we’ve all been there. The key is remembering this simple truth:
Great bourbon is meant to be enjoyed, not hoarded.
Unless it’s your last bottle of Stagg. Then yes, absolutely hoard it.
Drop season is here—and with it comes chaos. Bottles hit shelves, secondary prices spike (or dip), and more than a few wallets get burned. To navigate the madness, you need more than hype. You need real data.
That’s exactly what the Bourbon Blue Book® delivers: over 8,500 bottles tracked, live market values, and constant updates—all inside the Bourboneur app. No noise. No guesswork. Just clarity.
👉 For $3/month or $25/year, the Blue Book pays for itself the moment you avoid one bad buy—or spot the right deal.
And bourbon isn’t just about bottles - it’s community—join 26,000+ enthusiasts who live this passion every week. From bottle drops and market insights to reviews and flavor debates, you’ll be first in line for what’s happening next.
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That’s Bourboneur.
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